Boondoggle of pork, in a cream sauce

That’s what this solar energy initiative launched locally on the federal dollar by Congressman Maurice Hinchey is.

But, surprisingly, it’s not the sort of thing that gets under my skin. It’s old-school pork, as opposed to the launch of a disasterous new federal entitlement program that would never go away, for instance.

On the other hand, solar energy is a subject about which I speak ex cathedra, and I’ll tell y’all straight up that this thing will go nowhere, fast. Maybe something will come out of their charge to develop military applications, but what that would or could be is anyone’s guess. Will they reinvent the solar-powered battlefield calculator?

Basically, I’ve forgotten more about solar energy than these people will ever know, and I note for the record that amidst all the bluster I’ve been reading about this project that they’ve never actually said what they’ll be doing other than, from Hinchey’s press release, “solv[ing] technical problems from within the solar industry preventing more efficient and cheaper solar technology from going to market.”

Like what, for example? Well, here is Maurice offering further explanation:

Solar energy is the solution to the country’s and the world’s energy problems. There is no need to drill for oil when we can get our energy directly from the sun,” Hinchey said.

That’s recycled gibberish from the 1970s. I know, because I was one of the original manufacturers of nonsense like that. But, hey, the Vandam Home for the Vandams always welcomes the spare government dollar to subsidize our large household staff, so get in touch fellas, and tap into our vast solar energy consulting empire at our exorbitant consulting fees. I’m ready to help you take everyone on the long leisurely ride through the countryside to the end of the road where the federal dollars are no more. We can all have a lot of fun getting there. Spread that cash around, in the meantime.

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